Twigs comic strip...

Jean has this teddy bear named Twigbee. They have been friends since she was 2 years old. Twigbee and I don't get along. He's always giving me dirty looks. And he stares at me all the time with those beety eyes. So I punch him and kick him across the room.
Anyway, Jean wanted me to draw a comic strip of her and Twigbee. Of course the bully is me. She told me what to draw and I drew it. Stupid bear... She bribed me with popcorn. I couldn't say no.

I want you to draw for me but I hate your artwork...

I hate people... This guy found me online. He wanted me to draw 2 sketches. One of him with a football body and one with a baseball body.
When we talked on the phone he kept over talking me. He had no interest in what I had to say.
Then he starts showing me other caricature artist's websites and tells me that he wants me to draw like them.
I ignored him and tried my best to get the sale. I just wanted him to send me photos so I can start drawing him.
Instead of a photo of himself, he sends me this Email with the caricature you see to the left.

"Nic here you go.

Would hair even on both sides. This photo has me riding in the wind, so you can't see the other side of my hair on the side below the ears."

He wanted me to redraw this sketch of his face and put a different body on it.

Then I realized this guy wants me to draw for him, but he hates my artwork, so he wants me to draw like someone else. What a wait of time. Why not just contact a different artist.

I was so pissed! I couldn't do it. I sent him on his way...

Tales from New York...

Hey guys. I'm at Canal Fest here in Tonawanda, New York. This is where I met Dave.

Say Hi Dave! Dave was a reject. Dave tried to tell me what to draw and I ignored him. He sat in my chair acting all ghetto and hard with his man boobs. When I showed him the sketch he got upset. "I tol you not to make my hea aw big!" I explained to him that he doesn't have the option to tell me what to draw. And that I'm here to make fun of him. Dave got mad and left.

So I decided to put Dave up as a demo. Little did I know, Dave was a local Celebrity. Not really, but a lot of people new him. For the next 3 days random people would come to the stand laughing. "Yo dog, that's Dave. Yeah, I know Dave". "Awe snap, Look is Dave." "Hey I know that guy, it's Dave." "Dave the prez of my car club."

So Dave became the mascot of the Fair.

I figured Dave got word that his sketch was hanging up at the stand so I took it down. I didn't want people to steal him. So now he's the RV mascot. Every time we leave the RV we say bye to Dave by smacking him in the face.

Hey, who know, maybe some of you guys know Dave too.